I’ve been thinking about my practise, and imagining the ways I could develop my practise now that I am creating every day, and comfortable with sharing my practise no matter how bad the art is.
Side note – I’m getting over thinking about my art in terms of bad art versus good art, because all artists make practise art as part of the process of creating finished pieces of art. The thing that happens online is that a lot of artists only share the lovely end product, or the processes involved in creating the lovely end product, and the practise art is often not even mentioned.
Now, every artist is free to choose what they share, and if doing it that way is the best way to avoid inviting the inner critic and blocks in, then that’s absolutely fine. I’m finding that this blogging process is working for me in overcoming blocks, and my inner critic, and helping me explore my process – and if anyone else is finding that interesting, or even helpful, then that’s a bonus.
I remember I tried this years and years ago, and there was a person who I knew then who though it was hilarious, and wrote a shitey patronising blog about me, and I ended up blocked, and just stopped sharing this way, and stopped making art.
This time around that isn’t happening, because that person is no longer in my circle, and anyone who else did that would be immediately shunted. Gone. No deliberation.
If I have learned anything, it is that protecting your own creativity from external monsters is as necessary work as getting control of internal ones.
Anyway, now that I am more comfortable with this part of the process, and I have some rhythms undulating that mean I am creating every day, I am pondering ways to add to that.
It feels like a juxtaposition between allowing myself the freedom to make a mess, to make shit art, to practise, to have good days and bad days, and finding more discipline in how I am creating. Ew, discipline is just such a stinky concept, but I remind myself I have had to develop a certain discipline to blog and create every day for all these days.
I want to develop my voice more, while retaining the freedom to play and be very intuitive and do whatever random thing comes into my head.
As I’m writing the very obvious thing that suggests itself is increasing how much time I am actually making art, so maybe I need to set a timer, and for that set amount of time, make art. I’m not sure that would work for me, but I suppose I could experiment, and see if it works. I just don’t want to get into a space where I am setting rules and risking becoming rigid, but I want to have something a bit more cohesive in terms of what I’m making.
As I’m writing that, I’m hearing an inner voice telling me to stop being such a wanker, and who do I think I am… hello Bluebeard, fancy meeting you here. That would be my message to push through that internal attempt to shut me down, if ever there was one.
I did set a timer today, and I focused only on arty things for 2 hours, no interruptions, no picking up my phone, just arting. I enjoyed the little boundary, and it kept me focused, so I’m going to do the same tomorrow, and see how it goes.
Some of my time was spent collecting together collage fodder for this week’s Let’s Face It class, and making little piles of eyes and noses, so that was fun, but my little artist voice kept saying I needed to paint, so I did.
I mixed up some caput mortuum and medium in a pot, and used that with my Shitty Brushes to do some sketching in my A4 sketchbook. First I used a mirror, and made some faces, and tried to catch the expression. The sketch looks nothing like me, and that’s what I was aiming for, but the sketch has the kind of look I am aiming for. It’s a starter sketch that I can use for other sketches.
I went back to my hare sketch from the other day, and mad another sketch from that, and it’s different again, and I’m enjoying pushing this one sketch to see where it goes.
Thanks for reading,
Til the morn,
Suzanne
121/200
Thrummie Bizzum 
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